Hamish and Embley
May 16, 2007
Filed under:Jackass
This won’t make a whole lot of sense for anyone not actually IN the Perth area, or Australia I suppose, but it’s funny anyway… at least to me, and that’s really all that matters.
Andy Lee, half of the long-time comedy duo “Hamish and Andy” and national radio star, has a secret. And I’ve found it out. And now that its out I realise that it’s not a very well kept secret.
See, Andy Lee has a girlfriend, an international oozingpurehottitudinal soopermodel. And she’s from Perth. Now that he’s won one of the more prestigious Glamour Contests, one may reckon that Andy could land just about any tomato on the vine right?
Well, there’s a reason he chose one from Perth folks. Perth is also home to the AFL Premiers, Champions of the League, Awesomest of the Awesome… The West Coast Eagles.
See, skinny and a bit dorky may fly when you’re on radio and that’s the look you’re shooting for. Tall with the curls and the slightly Jewish nose and the I’m-the-guy-you-buy-beers-for-cos-you-just-love-me-straightaway smile is more than just a look for this comedic talent.
It’s a front. A cover-up. A smoke-screen AND a red herring. Shit, it’s a purple herring even.
Andy… I’m onto you. It didn’t take a Rocket Surgeon to piece it together, I’m just amazed that no one else has stumbled across this amazing connection.
Say it with me:
Andy Lee…
Andrew EmbLEY…
And again. And again. One more time…
BOOM, check this out:
I know, I KNOW. Man, it threw me for quite a loop too, and I’m not only a rabid Eagles fan, but I usually listen to these clowns in the afternoons on 92.9 and it still took me a year or so to put it together.
What’s that? STILL not convinced? Okay… I didn’t want to have to do this, I mean this picture was taken without their knowledge and would be used, on this website only, without their permission but…
There it is. Hamish Blake, caught in a moment that says so much about the pair, their relationship, and his feelings towards his partner’s double life.
Hamish has obviously dolled himself up in an Eagles uniform, snuck on into the Eagles Premiership Celebrations, and is attempting to fit in as “one of the boys” with the rest of the crew.
No doubt that the look that Andy… or should I say Andrew? is giving him is because he can’t very well ADMIT his secret to the rest of the fellas. Especially not after just winning the Premiership (AND Norm Smith Medal).
He HAS to play it cool for the sake of the Eagles Team, who surely would have NO chance of a repeat Championship with the distraction of a Supermodel-schtooping, oddly-named-dog-racing, ah-ain’t-he-sweet-ing NATIONAL radio star in their midst. The fact that he didn’t simply throw his oversteppin-the-bounds Radio Cohort out is probably only due to the good will and celebration in the air.
So there. I’ve said it, I’ve outed him. The secret is out and I’m NOT sorry.
Seriously, you’re a freakin’ Rock Star on the radio, a Ninja on the Footy Field, you win Footy Championships and you roll around nekkid with a supermodel. I’m not sorry at all that I exposed your little secret.
In fact, I may be secretly jealous.
But I’ll never tell.
16 Comments
I’m not sure that made sense. Good use of the Perth-only disclaimer.
But, I am glad to see that you’re a footie fan. Do you have one of those awesome white suits with the hat? Because if I lived there, it would be among the first 1 things I bought. Then, I’d buy a post and stand besides it and do that cool little double-barreled point thing that may or not mean “Touchdown”. There’s no way you haven’t worked the pointing thing into everyday life.
Now that both boys are playing youth soccer I’m really getting in it. Oops, I mean ‘footy’. And just how the hell does one choose a fave team, anyway? There’s only about eleventybillion of them in England alone, much less Oz. One of the dj’s at the radio station that I used to listen to in San Diego once sent a check to the city; he wrote it for a dollar and in the memo wrote “For the purchase of the SD Bay Bridge”. They cashed it and he forever claimed that the bridge was now his. He renamed it “Dave’s Bridge”.
Hmmm, guess you had to be there.
Okay sorry. Obviously some things need clarified.
“Footy” is NOT that pansy-ass, fall-down-cos-somebody-just-breathed-on-me, only-score-a-goal-every-decade game referred to even here as… “Soccer.”
WCG, that’s not to offend the fine folks whose beautiful children excel at the sport, for youth soccer is one of the last bastions of youth and sport in ‘Merca. My nephew is a RockStar at it, and I dig it. Just not for adults.
NGD, I’m not sure at all what you are talking about. The little white suit is for Tennis ain’t it? The little hat is cute though, and you are Damn Straight that I walk around doing the doublefingerguns pretty much all the time. The kids know that as the “Dad thinks I did something good” move. Though I Ninja it up a bit and add sound effects.
“Wichaaaa!”
“Wooshaaaaa!”
So yeah, “Footy” is AFL, Australian Rules Football, and it’s the best shit played on grass, ‘cept for Spring Copulation, though that one ain’t sanctioned yet. The Eagles are the home town team and they only play teams in Oz, so we don’t worry about the freakin’ soccer leagues and all their freakin’ teams, unless it’s the World Cup and then we back the Socceroos (insert comment about team name here).
I gotta go now, I’m going to buy the Windan Bridge and rename it “Poobumweefartbutt.”
I’m so happy to see you’ve converted and reintegrated the Letter U in your “our” words, like “Humour” & “Glamour”
I mean this guy:
http://www.footy.com.au/dags/images/1flag.gif
See, the little white coat and hat?
YOU stole MY code? Shit…things ain’t right in the world
Well, finally! Now where is the other site with photos of the kid who makes my ovaries hurt?
Australian Rules Soccer? Isn’t that also known as “Batshit Crazy Drunks Who Beat The Crap Out Of Each Other For Sport”? I think it’s called ‘rugby’ in England.
And I’m all for Spring Copulation…
Warcry, I must be the easiest mark on this blog if you’re going to consistently get me with that one.
“Footy” ain’t pansyfalldown sport, and it AIN’T GorrillaSmashShit sport. It’s its own and pure Aussie.
Keep this up and yer gonna get a Free Kick… inna nutz.
Now you’ve got me curious. I’m totally going to Google Aussie Rules Football while cupping my nutz. I’m talented like that.
Jo…I can kick her for you. A: She deserves it. B: Because footy rules. They used to play it on ESPN back in the mid 80’s all the time. I even understand the rules and used to have a Sydney Swans hat.
http://deadspin.com/sports/australian-rules-football/watch-out-for-that-post-mate-261941.php
Oh yeah, that’s right; REALLY give Judd a reason to kick me inna da nutz.
Good to see your still you. Every time I read your blog the image of you touching yourself to a No Doubt video flashes thru my head. Here is to the Ole’Times!
Heya…
Instead of listening to Hamish and Andy you should listen to Yasmin (Me)ans JR on Thursday mornings on 101.7. I have started volunteering at groove and I love it.
I am glad to see that you really are settling into Perth and I envy you as I am having a bit of a hard time adjusting to Perth.
How all is well! :)
This is such a pointless waste of time. I read through every single person’s comment & I believe I sat there, after it all, and asked myself.. why the fuck did I just waste precious moments of my life.
That I cannot answer, but I do believe you all need to get excellent paying jobs, pay more attention to your families and find some friends.
The WestCoastEagles always have been and always will be champions of football. No matter where they lie on the ladder, those boys will forever the heroes of australian sport.
GO THE MIGHTY EAGLES!?!?!?!?
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